


Found in Translation

by Sequesters



Category: LazyTown
Genre: M/M, Purring Sportacus, Robbie does internet research, it goes okay, okay that sounds like its some sort of innuendo i swear its not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-04 03:47:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16339238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sequesters/pseuds/Sequesters
Summary: Robbie gives Sportacus a present for his birthday.





	Found in Translation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [indigorose50](https://archiveofourown.org/users/indigorose50/gifts).



> Happy birthday, Indigo! It's quite late but I finally had some time to sit down and write! I hope you like it!

                Conceptually, Robbie already _knew_ that Sportacus was an elf.

                Oh yes, he had gotten over that little surprise long ago. Once they began DATING, however, he started to notice what that really MEANT, in day to day life.

                It meant being careful not to eat sugar before they kissed or Sportacus would go FLUMPing to the floor, it meant Sportacus could and WOULD exercise at all hours of the day, it meant that Robbie would be forced to JOIN IN on some exercises, it meant emergency hat-mending sessions before Sportacus could go out into town…it was a little strange, and a little fun, to see all these quirks up close and personal.

                However. There was one thing that NO part of living with Sportacus in the same town for years had prepared him for, and it was the _purring_.

                Purring was not only an involuntary expression of contentment, as Robbie found out by surprise the first time that he held Sportacus in his arms, but Sportacus could also purr on demand! It was a part of the Elvish LANGUAGE, he said!

                Robbie, the man who spoke multiple languages, had never encountered anything like THAT before, and he was _fascinated,_ eagerly learning all of the information he could about it. Sportacus was more than happy to oblige, and usually explained any that he did around Robbie.  A voluntary, sustained purr meant he was concentrating hard, three, chirp-like purrs meant a familial greeting, and four of them meant a formal greeting. SPEAKING through a certain kind of purr was considered passive-aggressive, which Robbie found HILARIOUS.

                And, sometimes Sportacus would grab Robbie’s face, press their foreheads together, and make an extremely… _specific_ purring noise. When Robbie asked what THAT meant, Sportacus had simply shrugged and said, “I love you.”

                Robbie had to… _sit down_ after that one.

-

                Two weeks before Sportacus’ birthday, his FIRST birthday since the two of them had began dating, Robbie realized something important.

                “We are DATING now,” he said to himself in his lair, pacing back and forth, “If he’s my BOYfriend, that means that I am OBLIGATED to get him something…GOOD.”

                He spun around, mid pace. “But WHAT would he WANT?” Robbie lamented, thinking hard about what type of birthday present to get the most healthy man in town.

                “I don’t WANT to get him SPORTSCANDY, eugh! He MIGHT make me EAT one! He can’t have anything SWEET, and I don’t know the FIRST thing about sports equipment!” Robbie ranted, “It’s like I can’t get him any PHYSICAL THING at all!”

                He gasped, and pointed his finger in the air. “Wait! I…have a BRILLIANT idea!”

                He raced over to his computer, and searched the words “how to make elf purring noises”.

                The first result was a blog, entitled Human Purrs.

                “Ahh, _that_ seems promising!” he said, clicking on the link.

                “Friendly reminder that a non-elf purring is…” Robbie squinted, “cult-u-ral appro-priation?”

                Attached to this post was a gif of a young guy saying “WHAT”. What did THAT mean?

                As Robbie read down the page of comment after comment, he got more and more confused.

 

“Our purrs are not just cultural, they are part of our LANGUAGE. It’s not cultural appropriation to SPEAK our LANGUAGE!”

“STOP TELLING HUMANS THIS I WANT THEM TO TRY TO PURR @ ME ITS HILARIOUS”

“YOU DON’T SPEAK FOR ALL ELVES, CULTURAL APPROPRIATION IS NO JOKE”

“OP ISN’T EVEN AN ELF”

“MAYBE NOT BUT I KNOW CULTURAL APPROPRIATION WHEN I SEE IT”

“LMAO THEY DEACTIVATED”

“#rekt”

“Every single blog here is deactivated the elfcourse left no survivors”

“This place is such a hellsite why are we even here”

 

                Robbie growled as he reached the end.

                “Ugh! THAT left me with NOTHING but QUESTIONS!” he spat, gesturing at the post as if addressing the myriad of commenters directly. “Is it GOOD?? Is it BAD?? I don’t KNOW!!  That was NOT helpful!” he griped, closing out of the tab.

                He crossed his arms and stood up, walking over to his chair and flopping down into it.

                “That’s QUITE enough internet for today,” he decided, and took a nap instead.

-

                A few days later, Sportacus again grabbed his face and let out a purr.

                “I wish _I_ could do that,” Robbie mumbled.

                “Me too,” Sportacus admitted, sighing. “It’s just not the same, verbally. But…I know you love me. So it’s okay.”

                Without even trying, Robbie had gotten his answer.

-

                That night, he decided to take another dive into the internet.

                “Purr…like…an…elf…” he typed laboriously, “TUTORIAL!”

                Snickering at his genius, he clicked on the first video link that came up, entitled “LEARN HOW TO PURR LIKE AN ELF--NOT CLICKBAIT!”

                A man with a bright pink hat and coat popped up on screen.

                “Halló everyone!!” he waved cheerily, “Welcome to Glanni Glæpur’s stylish yet _illegal_ corner of the internet, where I teach you all some questionable skills that I have acquired over a LONG and DASTARDLY career! Today’s lesson is…purring like and elf!”

                Robbie sat through Glanni’s YoutuberTM intro impatiently, where quick cuts of the man in different outfits flashed across the screen to the tune of some sinister music, until the channel’s title “Stylish yet Illegal” popped up in fancy lettering.

                Then, Glanni was back.

                “I _personally_ have an elf boyfriend-“

                “What a COINCIDENCE!” Robbie gasped.

                “-and he purrs ALL the time. And I mean, ALL the time. I asked him about it once, and when he said it was a part of his LANGUAGE, I just KNEW I had to find out how to do it! Imagine the PRANKS I could pull on a WHOLE NEW POPULATION if I just knew how to convincingly purr!! Hah hah! Ahem. The only problem is that Elvish purring is nigh-impossible for a human unless you can do a few different things. Before I tell you about THOSE, though, make sure you like and subscribe, and check out my patreon, where patrons get early access to-“

                “OGH! Get to the POINT, Glanni,” Robbie mumbled, skipping through the video until he heard a convincing sound.

                Glanni pursed his lips smugly. “And THAT’S how you do it.”

                “Dammit!” Robbie swore, skipping back a minute or two to try to find the explanation.

                “And the NEXT thing you have to do is-“

                “Dammit!!” Robbie swore again, skipping back to the beginning and crossing his arms. “I hope you get a lot of _ad revenue_ from this,” he snarled, listening to his inane story in full.

                However rambly Glanni was, he certainly did know what he was talking about. By sheer chance, Robbie could also produce the low growling noise that Glanni said was “imperative to make it sound convincing” and so from there, he could convert it into a sort of purr.

                All he had to do after that was practice.

                And ignore all sorts of questions from Sportacus about why he kept losing his voice, day after day, coincidentally whenever Sportacus went for his evening run.

-

                Sportacus’ birthday was a BIG deal in Lazytown, and why wouldn’t it be? The flippity floppity elf had rolled into town and near-singlehandedly improved the lives of every one of its residents, including Robbie’s.

                There was going to be a BIG party. Stephanie was going to make one of her famous sugar-free apple pies, Ziggy would take care of the sugar-FULL desserts, Trixie and Pixel teamed up for entertainment, and Stingy had claimed the role of “party supervisor”.

                Whatever.

                It was going to be a BLAST, that’s for sure, but Robbie knew for a fact that he would NEVER be able to give Sportacus his gift in front of…all of the CHILDREN!

                He’d have to do it beforehand, when Sportacus came down to pick him up.

                He paced nervously in his lair as he waited, worst-case scenarios running through his head. What if he said it all wrong? What if Sportacus didn’t LIKE it? What if he accidentally said an Elvish SWEAR WORD?? Oh, Sportacus would NEVER let him live THAT down!

                So when Sportacus actually GOT there, Robbie was an anxious mess, sweating bullets in his finest party suit and birthday hat.

                “Robbie, are you okay?”

                DAMMIT.

                “F-fine, fine, I’m perfectly fine,” Robbie said unconvincingly.

                Sportacus raised an eyebrow at him.

                “But,” Robbie continued, “I-I want to give you your BIRTHDAY gift. Be-BEFORE we go to the party, I mean.”

                “Oh, o-okay!” Sportacus said, slightly taken aback. “What is it?”

                “Well, it’s that-um-“ Robbie fidgeted nervously, “The gift is that-that I want to…TELL you something.”

                Sportacus’ eyebrows knit together in concern. “What is it? Are you _sure_ you’re okay?”

                “Oh, yes, yes, I just-“ Robbie clumsily grabbed his face and pressed their foreheads together, letting out a deep growl with his lips firmly shut, just like he practiced.

                Was it perfect? No. It sounded weird, and grumbly, and it kind of hurt Robbie’s throat.

                But oh, what Robbie would give to be able to capture the look on Sportacus’ face in that moment. His mouth agape, his eyes filled to brimming with tears, his hand coming up to touch Robbie’s face in disbelief.

                “H-how did you-?”

                “Practice,” Robbie said simply, stroking the small hairs at the side of Sportacus’ head, “I uh…I wanted to say it… _your_ way.”

                Sportacus let out a sob and pressed his head into Robbie’s chest.

                Robbie’s eyes widened as he held him tighter, a bit thrown off by the reaction. He didn’t know that this would be such a big deal! He expected a “wow, great job Robbie!”, or a double thumbs up, or a big smile, or…SOMETHING like that, not…a DISTRAUGHT elf!

                “Are, uh, are _you_ okay?” he asked haltingly.

                Sportacus abruptly straightened up. “I’m _fantastic,_ ” he sniffed and wiped his eyes, grinning wide, “It’s just…I never thought that I would ever-“

                He took a breath, and pressed their foreheads back together. “I always hoped, you know, since I was young, that one day I would hear someone tell me they love me like that,” Sportacus admitted quietly, stroking Robbie’s face, “In English, I know what you _mean,_ but Elvish is the language of my heart and soul, and something that I cannot describe is…well it’s lost, in translation. And-and I never thought I would ever hear you say it, because you’re a human, but then you _did!_ You-I-th-this gift…this gift is _priceless,_ Robbie.”

                 “Y-you’re welcome.” Robbie said, still reeling from his reaction, “And um, happy birthday.” He tried to think of something else to say, but Sportacus’ infectious grin was mere inches away, so he just smiled to himself as he leaned in to kiss him.

                “I really…REALLY love you, Sportacus,” Robbie murmured quietly when they broke apart. “And I want you to KNOW it, in whatever language it TAKES.”

Sportacus smiled toothily, purring contentedly.

 “So…ahem…” Robbie cleared his throat and gestured toward the door, “Party?”

“Oh! Yes, I guess we had better get going,” Sportacus nodded, rubbing the back of his neck, “But before we go…could you say it in Elvish one more time? Please?”

Robbie fought down a smile despite the glow in his chest, and pulled his elf close again, happy to oblige.

 

**Author's Note:**

> The gif in question is the one of Jesse Pinkman from Breaking Bad, where he's leaning out of a car, I don't know how to embed gifs I'm sorry


End file.
